


looking at all or nothing, babe it's you and i

by notthebigspoon



Series: Dirty Hands [3]
Category: Baseball RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-24
Updated: 2013-03-24
Packaged: 2017-12-06 07:41:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/733111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notthebigspoon/pseuds/notthebigspoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>George is splattered head to toe with blood, bone fragments and gray matter. He looks at Ryan with zero emotion, inspecting first the dead body on the floor and then his shirt. He flicks a glob of gore away, watches it land on the floor with a splat before calmly announcing that he doesn’t care for the messiness. That’s the day that Ryan starts being a little terrified of him.</p><p>Title is taken from All or Nothing by Theory of a Deadman.</p>
            </blockquote>





	looking at all or nothing, babe it's you and i

**Author's Note:**

> The blank page line is from something I heard once but I don't remember who it was about.

George is splattered head to toe with blood, bone fragments and gray matter. He looks at Ryan with zero emotion, inspecting first the dead body on the floor and then his shirt. He flicks a glob of gore away, watches it land on the floor with a splat before calmly announcing that he doesn’t care for the messiness. That’s the day that Ryan starts being a little terrified of him.

He’d known since he started working with Javi that there was something more than a little off about him. He wasn’t the sunny, outgoing soul that had carried the bullpen backpack. He was cold, withdrawn, generally emotionless. Ryan had initially thought that that was his way of reconciling a sweet and caring nature to a brutal and violent lifestyle. Now he’s not at all sure. When he asks Javi who George is, who he _really_ is, Javi shrugs and keeps reading his book.

“He’s whoever I want him to be.”

Someone like Ryan is not easily intimidated. He kills, steals and takes his retaliation out in blood without batting an eyelash. But someone like George, who becomes anyone he wants to be, generally errs on the side of self promotion and self preservation. He’s loyal to Javi but Ryan is willing to bet that with the right motivation, George would turn his back on Javi. Maybe he’d even kill him.

For a little while, after they’ve left Dallas for Las Vegas, he forgets about it. Ryan does a little hunting, starts to finally look for Gavin Lutz. There’s no point delaying it any more, not when he’s stopped pretending he’s just another one of El Gato’s employees. He doesn’t need to formulate a reason to stick around, not anymore. Whatever it is he’s got with Javi, it’s until the end, even if the end is bloody and sad.

In their line of work, things rarely end well, rarely end pretty. He doesn’t expect his so called Cinderella existence as Ryan Vogelsong to share the magic with Drew Sparrow.

George consents easily enough to being wired up and sent to the airport to watch Lutz’s plane come in. He blandly asks if he should go ahead and kill Lutz himself before telling Ryan to be mindful of how he fastens the mic, he hates having to straining to hear audio over the rustling of fabric. Ryan dryly asks if he’s worried about losing chest hair. George shrugs and tells him he kind of likes that, it’s nice to really _feel_ something once in awhile.

That’s the not he leaves on, leaving Ryan to sigh and shake his head. He pours a few fingers of whiskey and parks himself at the desk, propping his feet up and listening to the sound of George traveling to and then navigating the airport. It’s going fine right up to the second he hears Romo’s voice, jubilantly greeting George. Ryan sits up straight, staring at the screen and flinching when Javi plants a hand on his shoulder, quietly and firmly telling him to let George handle things.

He does. Like a flip has been switched, George automatically becomes bright and happy George Kontos, in Vegas with some friends and on his way out of town. He sounds disappointed that he can’t take take Romo up on an offer to hang out. There’s a regretful parting and George saying that they just called his flight, followed by silence and the muffled sound of a conversation, like George is covering the microphone. Javi still doesn’t seem worried. He orders Ryan to wait and Ryan does.

George’s voice rings through the speakers. “I see Lutz but I can’t follow him without Romo seeing me.”

“So? Follow him anyway.”

“It’d make me look suspicious.” George answers blankly. “Gimme a few minutes. I’ve got it under control birdie.”

Javi smothers a snort of laughter, grinning at Ryan and leaning close to the microphone on Ryan’s headset. “And how do you plan on making it work, Georgie?”

“I just set airport security on Romo. And... there they go. Shutting off my mic while I follow Lutz. Don’t want to risk feedback. Talk to you later.”

Ryan gets up and plants his hands on the desk, staring at his laptop and the now flat line of the audio program like it will tell him all of George Kontos’s secrets. The man makes zero sense at all and he’s going to drive Ryan crazy. Or he’s going to kill Ryan. Ryan sees that as a distinct possibility. The guy doesn’t seem capable of any sort of positive emotion.

When Javi reaches out and pulls Ryan down into his lap, Ryan yelps in surprise, sighing when Javi runs his fingertips over his jaw, toying with his hand.

“Why are you so worried about George all of a sudden?”

“The guy is a sociopath. He’ll let me die the second it becomes beneficial or convenient for him.”

“George is loyal.” Javi hums, staring at the ceiling. “He considers us his. He’ll likely never put us above himself but he’ll put us above all others. Look at how he threw Romo under the bus just now. He’s following Lutz for you, and he’s doing what he has to to get you what you want.”

“But why? Why would he help me?”

“Because giving you what you want sends him somewhere that resembles happiness. It pleases him to please you. And even if he is a sociopath, he’s more of a Sherlock type than an Anton Chigurh type.”

Ryan snorts. “And what? We’re John and Lestrade?”

“Close enough.” Javi shrugs. “You’re overthinking this. I did too, at first. But then I just accepted that something in his brain just isn’t wired right. There’s no describing George or fixing him. He is what he is, accept it.”

“You love him.”

“I do. And so do you. I know you do.”

“I love _you_.” Ryan snaps. “It’s me and you. I don’t know what he is.”

“He’s like a blank page. He’ll be whatever you want him to be. He’ll wait for you to give him a cue and then he’ll try to be that person. But forget it for now. You love me?”

“No. I torture and murder sycophants for everyone I meet. Thinking about bringing it up to Bochy.” Ryan mutters, flushing. “It’s... after I got rid of that guy in Dallas, all I could think about was getting back to you. Protecting you. Taking care of both of us. We’re in this together. All or nothing babe, it’s you and I.”

Javi’s eyes flash and there’s a fierce ‘love you too’ before he’s grabbing a handful of Ryan’s shirt, pulling Ryan into a kiss that’s teeth and blood and fighting. It summarizes them perfectly, as does the way Javi does just as Ryan wants, getting up and following Ryan to the bed. They pull each other’s clothing off, pitch it across the room. He pushes Ryan onto the bed, covers his body with his own, never stops kissing him. When he comes, he whispers ‘us against the world’ as he presses a kiss to Ryan’s pulse.

They lie together after, basking in the silence and the late afternoon sun pouring through the windows. George lets himself in when he comes back, unfazed by their state of undress, tossing Ryan a room key and telling him he’s got a booty call with Lutz later. When Ryan laughs and asks if he wants to get laid before Ryan takes care of business, George shrugs. It’d be round two he says. Round one occurred in an airport restroom stall to get the invite back to the hotel room. He tells Ryan to wake him up later if he’s needed before disappearing into the adjoining room.

“He slept with a guy... just to get me close, when I probably could have gotten in another way.”

“Path of least resistance.” Javi yawns, burying his face in his pillow. “Take him with you when you go. Another round of sex wouldn’t hurt him and I’d love knowing Lutz died with his pants down. Make it ugly. I want to send a message.”

“Look what the cat dragged in?”

“Cute. But yes. Leave a calling card. I want people knowing they’ve got _both_ of us to contend with. Night baby.”

“Night...”

When Ryan goes to the Bellagio that night with a cloned room key, he sends George ahead with instructions to go for round two. Gavin Lutz dies halfway through a post coital cigarette and for the second time, Ryan is the reason George is covered with blood and brain matter. He sends George to clean up in the bathroom, cleaning and staging the room to Javi’s liking. Lutz’s body is arranged on the bed, a paw print and feather carved into his skin, when George comes out.

“Nice.” He muses. “Javi’s idea?”

“Mmhmm.” Ryan answers, blinking when George smooches him and moves on. He kisses Javi like that all the time. It’s the first time he’s kissed Ryan. Maybe Javi was right. George really _does_ think of Ryan as his.

They leave the hotel together, out the doors just as the fire alarm starts going off. They walk halfway down the street before catching a cab back to their hotel and Ryan watches George. The younger man is staring out the window with his usual lack of emotion. Instead of it scaring Ryan, this time it makes him feel a strange sort of affection.

George is what he is, and he’s Ryan and Javi’s.


End file.
